So the most recent CT scan was not encouraging - the chemo only shrank the tumors but they are still there.
Funny thing is, is that I recently went to see my primary caregiver, herself a cancer survivor, and in the course of our conversation she said it sounded like I had already given up. Which I had. But she succeeded in giving me a little hope that maybe things weren’t so bad. For a couple of days, I had that little bit of hope until I had the scan. No more chemo. No more hope.
Except for experimental treatment or immunotherapy. I now have an appointment with a specialist for my sort of cancer in a few weeks.
All the while, I can’t help but think the cancer is growing and spreading. I am still tired almost all the time and the least exertion exhausts me. The oncologist's best guess is that I have two years of life left, but I think that is too optimistic. We’ll see. I am already losing weight because most food is unappealing and I have little appetite.
All I seem to do is knit, which makes me happy. Here is another pair of socks for Sweetie made from Berroco Sox. Currently on the needles is a pair for School Marm. Her pair is mosaic knitting, a pattern by Caryl Pierre on Ravelry. I just switched from double-pointed needles to 2 circular needles per sock and I am amazed at how much I like making socks this way. No more little gaps between needles and since the new ones are chrome-plated, knitting is faster because the needles are so slick.
