Monday, March 31, 2008

Allow Ink to Dry

John Belushi and Chevy Chase did this skit once...

Spring comes in like a lion, and goes out like a lamb. That’s how March works here in the United States.

But did you know that March behaves differently in other countries? In Norway, for example, March comes in like a polar bear and goes out like a walrus. Or, take the case of Honduras where March comes in like a lamb and goes out like a salt marsh harvest mouse.

Let’s compare this to the Maldive Islands where March comes in like a wildebeest and goes out like an ant. A tiny, little ant about this big.

[holds thumb and index fingers a small distance apart]

Unlike the Malay Peninsula where March comes in like a worm-eating fernbird and goes out like a worm-eating fernbird. In fact, their whole year is like a worm-eating fernbird.

Or consider the Republic of South Africa where March comes in like a lion and goes out like a different lion. Like one has a mane, and one doesn’t have a mane. Or in certain parts of South America where March swims in like a sea otter, and then it slithers out like a giant anaconda.

There you can buy land real cheap, you know. And there’s a country where March hops in like a kangaroo, and stays a kangaroo for a while, and then it becomes a slightly smaller kangaroo. Then, then, then for a couple of days it’s sort of a cross between a, a frilled lizard and a common house cat.

[Chevy Chase tries to interrupt him]

Wait wait wait wait. Then it changes back into a smaller kangaroo, and then it goes out like a, like a wild dingo. Now, now, and it’s not Australia! Now, now, you’d think it would be Australia, but it’s not!

[Chevy Chase tries to interrupt him]

Now look, pal! I know a country where March comes in like an emu and goes out like a tapir. And they don’t even know what it means! All right? Now listen, there are nine different countries, where March comes in like a frog, and goes out like a golden retriever. But that- that’s not the weird part! No, no, the weird part is, is the frog. The frog- The weird part is-

[has seizure and falls off chair]

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Use Caution When Opening

Due to current fucked up computer fuckage, if you absolutely must contact me, use this address --

heizen14@yahoo.cm

Monday, March 24, 2008

MI, 10 Cent Refund

I now have to admit that Claudia, the netherland dwarf female that I was "gifted" with last year has had babies and the horn dog called Percival is the daddy. They are dwarves with angora tendencies. I feel like Dr. Moreau, creating these mutants. No, I didn't really create them, but I allowed the procreation to happen, and so am culpable.

Four little dwarf babies. Two are "tawny" and two are grey and white, like their ma. They are three weeks old and driving mom nuts. Saw her nursing and she had to stand on her tippy toes to accommodate them all. Last week, Randy Bob's two girls came to visit and of course were captivated by the tiny fur balls.

Here is Olivia.




And Morgan.



The inside kids are still inside - but on nice days, they are outside helping to keep the grass and weeds in check. As is Winehouse, Amy. I know, I know. I need to get that big cage fixed for them, but neither Sweetie or I really want to see them go to the barn. We are not farmers. We are hopeless, and poor, romantics.




Yes, Knitting Linguist, I did carry Murgy around a lot, but he could motivate pretty good on his own, using his front stumps in a sort of swimming motion.

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

May Cause Dizziness





Oh, my dear Knitting Linguist -

If you think the Runtling is adorable, cast your gaze upon the late and still very much lamented Murgatroyd! He went over the Rainbow Bridge almost a year ago and still Sweetie and I say regularly, "I miss Murgie."

This is Also Your Return Envelope





Lots of rain here. Lots. Rain is forecast until midnight tonight.

None of this water should be here. There is a little creek, (I say crick,) that you can't usually see. And more rain coming.

Sheila's babies are all still in the house. It's getting a little out of hand, the volume of poop and all. I'm really going to have to deal with this. Soon. I said that last week, didn't I. They just have free run in the house and I can find them anywhere, at anytime. They are still so darn cute!




Still cranking away at the drum carder and slaving over a hot dye pot. The brochure is pretty much done, too. I'll only have them in black and white, because I intend to have copies made at the copy shop. Hewlett Packard inks run and bleed at the slightest hint of moisture. Ask me how I know.

Friday, March 14, 2008

Do Not Open

I have aged about ten years in the last two. I always looked way young for my actual age. Until menopause, that is. Now I feel every bit of my fifty-one years. Crap.

On the plus side, I find it easier to move about in society. I am practically invisible. What a relief! Everyone expects less of me and am happy to oblige. I can address younger people as "Honey" or "Young Man" or "Hey, Kid."

I have put a bit of effort into my fuzzarelly.com website. I have been working in my studio. Also have been working on a brochure! Geek talk = I am so glad that the old computer, in OS9, supports Appleworks. It was free with the first iMac, back in '99, and I still love it.

Sweetie says he will have the new computer and free printer/scanner/fax up and operable by Monday. The scanner I am particularly interested in.

Monday, March 10, 2008

Subject to Acceptance of Terms

Blogging may be sporadic for the next few days as we get files, etc, etc transferred to the New iMac!!! It is so kewl. For one thing, it looks spectacular - what with the flat screen that is markedly larger than the old Mac. There is a fancy schmancy mouse and keyboard, too. I really like it. (Can you tell?)

It also takes pictures.




I'll have pictures of snow, too, once I get if figured out.

Thursday, March 06, 2008

Insert Tab Into Slot

The local weather forecasters are wetting themselves in excitement because a storm is on the way and there may be 2 to 8 inches of real live SNOW. Film at eleven. Gather up grandmaw and the youngins, buy that bread and milk, and pray to be saved from this horrible ordeal.

Yeah. Well. Whatevah. As long as sweetie gets home safely tomorrow night.

Still knitting on the socks. Little Nibbler wrote about the bumps caused in the Helix Knitting when she passed one color with the other. At first, I was going to say that one shouldn't out-lap the "lead" color with the other one. I mean, I don't. However, after some thought, I decided that it isn't necessarily wrong and may even produce some neat effects. Be Bold and Fearless!

Still working in the studio. And at the dyepot. I'm so happy!

Here is some news about life here in a small town. (Pop. 29) There is a certain rich person who has a part-time residence in our township. He paid for the renovation of the general store. He paid half the bill to rock the bank of the spring that was the reason our town was located here. In 1816. Fresh water, you know. It's really pretty now that it isn't an overgrown and stagnate ditch.

So. This guy has bought the brick school building up on the hill. It was built as a WPA project in 1939, to replace the wooden structure that had burned. At first, it was an all grades school and later, it became a K through 8. The county's schools were consolidated and it closed in 1984. I know lots of people here who either graduated or attended that school.

The property (building and 15 acres) was auctioned off and sat empty for several years. An entrepreneur bought it about 1995 and many improvements were made. The business went sour, and again, it has sat silent for several years. Until now.

There is all sorts of small town speculation as to what the upshot will be. A community center? Elder care? A place for small businesses? The rich guy is low key and closed mouthed.

For moi, it is my scenery to the west. It is what I see when I walk out my front door. I, too, am curious about what it will turn into. I trust the rich guy, based on his previous performance, so I know the renovation will be first class.

Bunny Pictures!!


Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Do Not Lick Flap

Knee deep in bunnies. I'm going to have to put them outside in the big cage, aka The Palatial Summer Cottage, by the end of the week. If it is warm enough. Sheila has them totally weaned and they are four and a half weeks old - eating and pooping up a storm. I always say that a baby bunny is just a digestive system encased in incredible cuteness.

Yes, I do have SUCKER written on my forehead. Why do you ask? Just because I bought 6 more angoras, along with cages and accouterments, this weekend. A breeding pair that originated with Leslie Sampson, and four of their offspring - Three Does and a Buck. (Doesn't that sound like a singing group from the fifties?) Their wool is really something; so thick and soft.

My enthusiasm for drumcarding fiber has not waned, and I have been spending three to four hours a day in my studio. Working. My experiment of mixing dyed angora mats with the merino was a great success! Just finished a half pound of orange mats and brown merino, and spun up a little bit "just to see." Very cool! Even spun fine, the slubs were effective without being overwhelming, as the mats compressed and were held in place by the merino. And it wasn't hard to spin, either.

How is everyone's Helix knitting experiment coming along? Nape Nibbler? As an afterthought, let me add that it doesn't matter where the second yarn is started, just not where the first yarn is and not where it will end where the first yarn begins. And I always keep a needle's worth of stitches between the end of one yarn and the beginning of the other, to avoid the Dreaded Jog. I've begun the second sock, and almost have the ribbing done on it.

Pictures later.