Monday, December 17, 2012

with real Glycerin Vibrafoam!

It's easy to understand why older civilizations worshipped the sun, especially those who live in the far north. "Will the sun stop it's journey this year or keep going west and leave us to die?" Winters must have been hard and miserable, hoping that there was enough food and fuel to last until spring.

I just have mild SAD, but I carefully watch the length of daylight and today, there will be 12 seconds less of it. Counting down to solstice.

Happy Festivus, everyone! And now, my favorite holiday song, Blue Christmas

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Everything You Need to Know

Sometimes, I miss my bunnies - especially the babies. There can be nothing more adorable than an angora at 5 or 6 weeks of age. But so it goes.

Earlier this year, I was often dreaming about abandoned and dead bunnies, ones I had forgotten to feed or water, and sometimes there were also chickens involved. My therapist believes that most dreams are about the dreamer, and she asked me what I had been neglecting in my real life. The answer was me.

I also had dreams about my mother, still alive but with cancer. Everyone knew she had cancer, but nobody talked about it. My therapist asked me to define cancer, and I replied that it was a tumor growing out of control. And what was out of control in my life? My drinking.

Once I had the reason for the dreams, I didn't have them again. Not once. 

But to return to bunnies for a moment, I have one now, named Bunny Boo Boo thanks to Sweetie. She is one of those throw away pets, an Easter present that grew up. On the plus side, she came with a nice big cage. She looks a lot like a small version of Heizen; a white and brown rex. She very much has her own personality: hating to be picked up or held but happy with ear rubs and carrots. When the weather is nice, she has run of the back porch. 

Bunny Boo Boo and Millie

Back when I had lost my first few pounds, I took my frightening measurements - 48-46-49. Yesterday, I again took tape measure in hand - 42-39-43. Yeah, me! I need new clothes!

Lastly, I saw my neck surgeon for the last time, I hope, today and even though the wound has not quite healed, it soon would be, like in a week or thereabouts. So, yes, I got the scar back in my fencing days; I was putting in some barbed wire…..(Or, as they say in southern Indiana, Bob Wahr.)

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Original Formula

I'm back home again from a 10 day hospital stay. Actually, I got here Monday afternoon, but I am still feeling puny and tired.

The infection came back in spades, the one in my neck, and it was really bad this time. The doctor made an incision on the outside of my neck to allow drainage away from my body so I'll have another nice scar. It isn't painful anymore, but I will say that morphine is a delight when used responsibly. Ha ha! I also had a few episodes of a fib, but since they were without symptoms, I was told not to worry too much about it.

I have a home health care nurse coming every day to repack the wound and check my vitals, but next week, I will need to learn how to do that myself every other day. 

Other than that, we are all doing well - me, Sweetie, Princess, Corky, Snoopy, Reese's, Milly, and Bunny Boo Boo.

Saturday, November 10, 2012

Authorized Dealer

Halloween has come and gone. Hooray. The election is over and I am relieved. There is still Thanksgiving this month and that other thing coming in December. 

And I am fully recovered. TON asked how one could swallow an earring. With great difficulty, I answer. It happened like this: I have a little saucer on the bathroom sink. Every day, I put my morning meds on the counter, and the evening pills in the saucer. Some days I am lazy, and put my earrings in the saucer, too, and so you can guess what happened. 

Back in January, I declared this to be the Year of Me. I wasn't sure what all that meant, but I put it out to the universe. This year I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes, high blood pressure and high cholesterol. I also weighed 232 pounds, had lower back pain, and got winded walking up stairs.

Over the spring and summer, I got the diabetes, blood pressure and cholesterol under control and lost 20 pounds. I also cut my long hair off and let it go gray. I suffered with the heat all summer long. I was miserable.

I finally really wanted to quit drinking, and I did, Just like that, pretty much. It's been about 2 months and the desire is mostly gone. I say mostly, because sometimes a cold beer is just the thing on a warm afternoon, but I am the pragmatist and know that one beer would lead to a 12 pack. (Interestingly enough, what made me quit more than anything was figuring up the cost of my beer habit and Sweetie's, too - over $4000 a year.) Sweetie has returned the keg back to the micro-brewery and doesn't drink inside the house.

I lost another 15 pounds.

Before the earring episode, I was getting my groove back with my art. I had more energy. I found my waist line. No more lower back pain. I started walking all three dogs at least twice a day. 

Now that I have recovered, I find that I have lost 42 pounds since the start of the year. I feel really vibrant and alive for the first time in a long time. I want to start lifting weights again. 

I look and feel pretty damn good for 55.

Now, I am wondering what I want to put out to the universe for next year. The Year of Becoming?

Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Hand Made in Germany

I am still alive, although Sweetie says it was touch and go for a while. (Methinks he exaggerates.) 

It all started when accidentally swallowed an earring, an earring with a fish hook, with my evening meds. I thought it was just a pill caught sideways in my throat, or whatever, and I went to sleep. It was only the next morning that when missed the mate to said earring and put two and two together. Duh. It was my therapist, at our Wednesday 1 o'clock appointment, who insisted that I go to Urgent Care. Immediately.

It wasn't in my upper intestine. It wasn't in my stomach. It was hanging firmly in my esophagus, near where the neck meets the shoulder. I was sent directly to the hospital, and the earring was removed. And all was fine.

Until Saturday, when I began to feel tired and sick, and then Sunday I could barely swallow and I had a temperature. Find me in the emergency room Monday morning, and then find me admitted to the hospital to treat the infection caused by the endoscopy. (I had been sent home with no antibiotics and not much in the way of instruction.) Hello painkillers and antibiotics in the arm, goodbye blood from the other arm. 

Oh, and it gets better! My first night there, something crazy happened with my heart called afibrillation, which I understand is Not Good. I woke up in the Cardio Ward, with more meds and more bloodsucking. (I won't go into my "Night of Rebellion" episode, where I was ultimately confined to
torture device with a 'she's out of bed' alarm.)

I've been home a week now, and am feeling much better, thank you. My heart seems to have responded well to the meds, fever normal, blood sugar normal, and 5 more pounds have been lost since last post. And still not drinking.

Nothing tastes good and I feel like crap.

Friday, October 05, 2012

For Office Use Only.


I have lost 35 pounds since the first of the year. I have gotten my blood glucose to normal, as well as my blood pressure. The cholesterol levels will have to wait until my next blood sucking.

We will re-finance our mortgage this month, down to 3.25%, fixed. And our house is worth more than we owe on it. 

I finally took Corky the corgi to the vet, knowing that it would probably cost a bazillion dollars, but after three weeks he is looking and feeling so much better! He's on antibiotics and antifungals, plus stuff for the yeast infection in his ears. He also seems to have Cushing's Disease, which is chronic but treatable. 

My meds have been adjusted a little and I have been sleeping about 14 hours a day. Or more.

Oh, and I have quit drinking.

(If any one of you write to say how 'proud' you are of me, I'll smack you. Instead, just say that you are happy for me. Okay?)

Friday, September 28, 2012

Je tricote mon fromage.

If you haven't been to Regretsy, go there. It's where DIY meets WTF.

Anyway, she is taking a little vacation, and her replacement will be - wait for it- Crochet Guevara.
I almost wet myself. But anymore, I do that every time I sneeze.

Monday, September 24, 2012

Avoid contact with eyes.

I know there are word geeks who follow my blog. Read this, okay? It'll be fun, or at least interesting.

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Quam difficile potest esse?

For the word geeks amongst us, and you know who you are.

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Be the ball.

I had a dream last night in which Bill Murray and I had sex. wtf?

Also at the party, (it was a costume party,) Lady Gaga appeared wearing a long, slim, pink gown with huge pink acrylic fingernails attached, making it look as if two large hands were holding her body. These nails could also be played as musical instruments, and her male entourage did so.

Sometimes I just can't wait for bedtime.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012


I'm in a very bad state of mind right now. Not at all happy. I have neuropathic damage to my feet due to diabetes, and my primary care provider wanted to give me pain pills. Duh! That is like the last thing to get!

So. I go see my wonderful therapist tomorrow, and I reckon we will begin to deal .

Saturday, September 01, 2012

Leaves a clean, non-greasy feel.

¡Hola, mes amis!

I am doing well these days, mentally and physically. The last two days have brought rain from Isaac which has cleansed the air of all the pollens that have been tormenting me all summer. It has been so dry here and the rain came as a steady drizzle most of the time, allowing it to soak into the parched earth. It has also been cooler.

After I finished the entrelac socks, I actually began working on my first art piece in about 6 years. Not playing, or hoping, or wishing, but really working. My therapist asked me if there was a way to move some of my over-stuffed studio into another room. Such a simple question and such a simple answer! To iron all the dyed cotton fabric pieces, I set up the ironing board in the office, at a low height so I could work while I watched movies on NetFlix or listened to public radio on iTunes. Then I moved a work table into the office that was big enough for my cutting mat, and I have been cutting some of the over 1600 2" squares I will need. (I want to have more like 1800 in order to have a larger choice.)

Yesterday, I cut a cotton batt to the finished size, plus extra, and attached it to the wall - in the office - and I began placing a few squares onto it. That's when I realized that I wasn't anywhere near cutting enough squares, so I have been alternating placing with cutting.

I have been so happy!

My friend Leslie.

Here is the cartoon that I am working from and some of the squares. The finished piece will be large; 54" X 72".

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Do not return this document.

Corn dying in the field.


The entrelac socks complete!

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Obey the Benevolent Overlords

Please go here and read K's blog, Dotted Yellow Line, about how Paul Ryan's proposed budget would affect her and her daughter.

Friday, August 03, 2012

Expect the Unexpected


This has been the Year of Me. It is working out well. Even I can tell that the new meds are doing good.

I am down to an allergy shot every two weeks. I still wonder if all of this will work. It has cost me a lot, as insurance did not cover the tests, but it does cover the shots.  I would love to be able to smell again. Every once in awhile, my nose works and I can smell what I am cooking, or my hair conditioner, or random household odors. Not having a sense of smell is really an awful thing. Is this milk bad? Is this meat over the top? Did one of the dogs have a shit storm in the house? Do I stink? So whenever I can smell, it is wonderful.

Otherwise, the new medz have really made a difference in everything. I am more alert and awake. I have been completing certain small organizational chores. I bought new black sandals, and I have clear lacquered my fingernails. The knitting on the entrelac sox proceed apace. 

I bought the Fall issue of Vogue Knitting, and my desire to create has been rekindled. ( For how long??) I don't want to question. I am thinking about advertising for a little knitting group that would meet at our local library. I miss being among other knitters. Figure I will talk to the library folks soon. 

But really? It's good! What a wonderful thing to be able to say!

Thursday, August 02, 2012

5 st to the inch


This has been the Year of Me. It is working out well. Even I can tell that the new meds are doing good.

I am down to an allergy shot every two weeks. I still wonder if all of this will work. It has cost me a lot, as insurance did not cover the tests, but it does cover the shots.  I would love to be able to smell again. Every once in awhile, my nose works and I can smell what I am cooking, or my hair conditioner, or random household odors. Not having a sense of smell is really an awful thing. Is this milk bad? Is this meat over the top? Did one of the dogs have a shit storm in the house? Do I stink? So whenever I can smell, it is wonderful. 

Otherwise, the new medz have really made a difference in everything. I am more alert and awake. I have been completing certain small organizational chores. I bought new black sandals, and I have clear lacquered my fingernails. The knitting on the entrelac sox proceed apace. 

I bought the Fall issue of Vogue Knitting, and my desire to create has been rekindled. ( For how long??) I don't want to question. I am thinking about advertising for a little knitting group that would meet at our local library. I miss being among other knitters. Figure I will talk to the library folks soon.

But really? It's good! What a wonderful thing to be able to say!

Monday, July 23, 2012

Soft and Hygenic


I don't remember when I last posted, but I have been doing ok transitioning to the new meds. Save for annoying Amputee to no end by a stupid remark I made on her blog. My anger was better served by ripping into a telemarketer that had been calling me for weeks, and already 4 times that day. The last call was at 8:30 in the evening, and I finally answered. He was trying to get me to switch my phone service to some "cheaper and better" provider. 

As an aside, can I say that I fell for this BS back in January, and I am still fighting with that company to have their monthly charge, which is still showing up on my phone bill, removed. I have filed 2 informal FCC complaints, which may do no good, but made me feel better. 

When I found out that this was a similar company, who had been calling about every day for weeks, I lost my top, and it felt so freaking good! I started with "Don't you ever, ever, ever call me again!!!" and then lots of swear words in a loud voice. Memories…..

And I haven't heard from that number again. I am also on Missouri's no-call list. 

Other news, as if you didn't know, the Midwest is suffering from the worst heat and drought since 1956. It's almost 7 pm, and it is still 102º outside. I went to city hall, a five block drive to pay my utility bill and pick up blue recycling bags, and by the time I got home, I was nauseated and weak. Sweetie took the Stalker Van to work today to make sure all was in order, so I could take it to Columbia Wednesday. Oh, yeah - guess I didn't tell y'all about the van breaking down a few weeks ago, on my way home from Columbia. It was 105º and at least I was able to coast to the shade of an overpass. Wrecker, heat, blah blah blah, home - finally. It turned out to be a simple problem, easily fixed by Sweetie, but I still refused to drive the van for awhile. Why drive the van? It's our only vehicle with air conditioning. 

If it weren't for air conditioning, I would be dead, and I don't want to die that way.

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Fragrance Free

¡Hola! from the Great Midwest!

I finished the latest Wingspan shawl. I used an acrylic boucle yarn; unusual for me to not use a natural fiber, but I had it already and I think it worked well. Click to embiggen.

I ordered some colorful Regia sock yarn from WEBS, and have cast on the Entrelac Socks for Noro Kureyon which I found on Ravelry. I also ordered 480 yards of lace weight alpaca and silk, which may or may not grow up to be the Swallowtail Shawl.

Today was my weekly trip to Columbia to get my allergy shot. One more weekly visit to go, then it be bi-weekly. Today, it welted a bit - about the size of a silver dollar. (Does anyone even remember silver dollars anymore?) Also saw my wonderful therapist. She handed me the scrip that my head doctor had given her, for me to get started on Cymbalta. Stay tuned.

I also bought myself a half-dozen roses.

Sweetie and the kids, in their natural habitat.

Friday, July 06, 2012

Take one nightly for 7 days.

Spent the day in Columbia, getting the allergy shot that I totally forgot about on Tuesday, and buying groceries and whatnot. Took the big-ass van, because it has air conditioning and the temperature was over 100º again.

Almost made it home. But something, I am thinking the fuel pump or some item that controls fluid, broke, and I was left stranded on the interstate. Mercifully, I was able to coast to the shade of an overpass, but it was not fun. Thank goodness, again, for cell phones and credit cards. The wrecker driver brought me home and helped me get my groceries out, and then took the van to a service station. 

This is not what I need right now. Also, this is the third time in three years that the van has broken down and had to be towed. Maybe it's time for something different, ya think?However, I am home, and not dead or mangled or in jail, so, life is isn't total shit. 

I saw a psychiatrist the other week, and she has put me on a mood stabilizer to help me with the lows I drop into whenever my PTSD kicks in, (which I have due to my fabulous childhood.) At least now I know wtf I have, and a plan of action to get better. After 6-7 months of therapy, I can now mostly speak about my mother without weeping, and that's good. I am to journal my feelings and moods daily.

Right now, I feel like a 5 on a scale of 1 to 10.

Monday, July 02, 2012

Naturally Flavored

Yes, I have become an infrequent blogger. Oops.

Generally, my life is so boring that I don't even care to comment upon it. 

My usual day is - sleep until 10 or 11. Scan the inner tubes for interesting crap, and become depressed over the lack thereof.

Either go back to sleep or make coffee and become moderately active. Load the dishwasher, or do some laundry. Collect the beer cans into the blue bags for recycling. Help Sweetie get off to work, sometimes with lunch, other times with enough cash for Taco Bell. 

Check Yahoo and Facebook. Play Cube Buster to loosen up, then a few games of multiplayer 8 ball pool. Then some Word Tornado, multiplayer scrabble on FB.

Have another few drinks and repeat.

It is so hot and dry here. Had the first rain in 2 or 3 weeks today, a gully washer with some small hail. Delightful to stand at the front door and watch it all come down. Glad, again, that I am not a farmer.

Went to the Friendship Spinners' retreat in mid-June. This is the arch Abbey. We all stayed in the building to the right. It was wonderful to see all my friends! I even spun a little of an angora-wool blend. I haven't spun since the mohair of last summer, which became a shawl for my dear friend Leslie. I am knitting another Wingspan shawl from Ravelry; my third. Happy and mindless knitting!

Watching Netflix, and other things on the inter webs. The new Sherlock Holmes, with Benedict Cumberbatch, set in modern day England. Have finished X Files. Have begun watching Breaking Bad, which Sweetie and I like whole bunches, having viewed the first 4 episodes. 

Finally, had a fun Sunday at High Hill at Gypsy Gatherings. There was the annual parade, with some excitement about horses and broken arms and such. Then, a fellow showed up, having played Frogger to get across the Interstate. We were the only shop open in town, and his radiator was in bad shape, and he was lucky to have found us and Sweetie, who actually had a clue. So Rusty, Leslie, Sweetie and I drank beer and helped the cute thang out. It turned out to be a fun evening! Bars Leak and cell phones saved the day. 

So there it is. My exciting life. 

Could be worse.

Monday, June 04, 2012

It's Shake 'n' Bake, and I helped!

Hola, Kindeys! Anyone remember those socks I started the same time I started therapy? It was sometime last fall, and I finished them last week. Don't remember what make of yarn it was, even, but I know I set out to make something a little different. Turns out that the only thing that is different is the rolled bit at the cuff. I used the shaped common heel with a finale of garter stitch.

One those were off the needles, I cast on a neat little shawl that is so easy-peasy, all garter stitch and no-wrap short rows! It is called Wingspan, and is a free download on Ravelry. I only had enough yarn to do 7 triangles wedges, but it is big enough to go 'round my shoulders with just the right amount of overlap to use a pin to keep closed. I like it a great deal and want to make another. (For scale, the tiles are 12" square.)

Next, I may cast on the Ethereal Triangular Shawl, also a free download on Ravelry. 

I have been taking a few drives and a few pictures. 

Except for my allergies, I am doing well. I don't know if is all the sunshine we are getting, but my mood has been up. Looking forward to seeing my Friendship Spinner buddies at their St. Meinreid Arch Abbey retreat in a couple of weeks. Both my therapist and my brain says that it would do me good.

Friday, May 11, 2012

Services Guide

Spring is here, and some days are almost July-like. I have been staying inside much of the time with the air conditioning on. Doctor's orders, along with no mowing at all. I had a bad asthma attack the last time I tried mowing, the worst in years, actually.

My recent blood work delighted me and my primary care giver! Cholesterol and blood pressure both are within normal ranges and my blood glucose is only slightly high. That med has been increased, but my new diet has done much of the work. I am eating better and I am feeling better, physically, and even mentally. A lot of stressful paperwork is behind me, too, and that makes me happier.

I have even been knitting a tiny bit. I have several skeins of lace weight yarn, and I am feeling the urge to just put away those never-ending socks and start on a shawl. Something complex, but not too. Maybe I will go through my files or check in on Ravelry to see what is out there. Again.

Sweetie and I plan to see Dark Shadows Sunday. That will be a pleasure, indeed!

Monday, April 30, 2012

Damn Acid Crazed Spiders!

The depression has taken a holt of me again. I physically feel good, but I have no interest in much of anything. Haven't knit a stitch on the latest pair of socks in weeks. Allergies are kicking my ass, making my asthma act up. It's hard to do anything. Sweetie has had one day off in the last two weeks, and I am lonely and hibernating while it rains. This weekend is supposed to get into the 90s and that is only another form of miserable for me. I miss my store and my friends there.

The house is a mess and the dogs need baths. And all I want to do is sleep.

Thursday, April 12, 2012

Squirrel Nuts

I won't even read my last post; just want you all to know where I am now. My health is better and I have lost fifteen pounds since my diabetes diagnosis. My blood pressure is almost normal and I am sure my cholesterol is much improved. Progress, not perfection. 

My depression comes and goes, but never entirely leaves. Good days and bad days, I have 'em. Getting weekly allergy shots.

I still see my therapist every week, and she has really helped me to deal with my childhood issues and she has given me tools to help cope. Her daughter is a massage therapist, and I had a session with her, oh, several weeks ago. Made me feel so much better, as she really worked on a knot in my lower back that was really painful. I hope to see her more often.

I closed my little store. I needed to focus more on taking care of myself, and putting myself closer to the top of "Things I take care of" list. The shop required a 60 hour per week commitment to be done properly, and it wasn't in me to do that. Thank goodness I can still sell things through Gypsy Gatherings.

I have a plan for a liberal arts course of my own making, studying modern philosophers from Camus until today. The current New Orker has an article about Camus and Sartre, and my interest was piqued. 

I have been thinking about the here after a lot lately. 

Especially when I come into a room and wonder what I came here after.

Your little joke of the day. Enjoy.

Tuesday, March 06, 2012

Aqua hubcaps


Since I was diagnosed with type-2 diabetes, about 6 weeks ago, I have lost 10 pounds. I am not dieting. I am eating three meals a day, and still drinking beer. I am not so much grossed out at breakfast. I am eating good, organic, and fresh food. I totally cannot believe that I have lost so much weight.

My goal is to lose 50 pounds by the end of the year. I think I can do it. 

My sweet friend Kristin came today and helped me clean my sewing room. I hate a messy sewing area, but because of my lower back pain and a sudden tendon-pull in my left ankle, I am so unable to straighten up by myself. We found some treasures amid the rubble and also got rid of a great deal of trash. There is also the give-away pile.

My blood pressure is near normal, and my blood sugar is better, but not where it needs to be. I am sure my cholesterol is better, too. My mood is generally better, thank you Ms. Sunlight. I still have my 'icky' days, the low-energy days where all I want to do is sleep, but generally, I'm OK. And some days? I sleep. A lot. 

I am not eating pizza, or weenies, or french fries. And I don't miss any of it. Still taking pictures, though.

Friday, February 24, 2012


Been busy trying to take care of myself. That part of my life is harder than anything else. Allergies are kicking up, and I feel like crap-on-a-stick. Sleepy, achy, and living as if my head is in the clouds.

Should have gone to the shop today, but couldn't move off the couch. I really want Purple Squirrel to succeed, but finding the energy is so difficult.

Going to Indiana soon, gonna be a dental floss tycoon. No, really. Renter is moving out, after her partner died suddenly in November. She can't stand staying in the same house, and has found a place a walk from her job. Sweetie has a personal day available, so will be going sometime early March to check out the property and dance with the ghosts at our old house. Glad that he is going with, because I don't think I could handle everything right now by my lone self.

Have felt so overwhelmed with life recently. Have to deal with taxes here shortly, but I at least have my paperwork in order for that. Therapy is helping. My therapist is wonderful, and not the least judgmental. Worth every dime, even though sometimes, I just sit and talk about my week. And am now getting weekly allergy shots, and have found a health food store and a great grocery store, and visit them every week when I am Columbia for my health things. Trying to eat more raw foods, more organic foods and all that hippie stuff. Maybe soon my allergies won't be kicking my ass so hard.

We women find it hard, mostly, to look after our own selves. We are last on every 'To Do' list. I am trying to make myself at least more the middle. Birthday tomorrow, turning 55. I have no idea how I lived and got this old. But a funny thing; a friend on fb complained about her restaurant neighbors, who chatting loudly about their personal friendship problems. I was able to comment that anymore, I don't hesitate to give them advise. And if they say anything such as 'mind your own bidness,' I act all innocent and say that I thought they were having a public, not private, conversation. Getting older has its rewards.

Friday, February 17, 2012


You know what I like doing at my shop? (The newly named Purple Squirrel.) I like saying to my customers, "Your total comes to 15.73, please." And when I give them their change and/or merchandise, I tell them "Thank you, and please come back." These are words that I so seldom hear in a retail experience, and that I take particular notice of it. 

In my opinion, the customer is what makes my shop exist. Small pleasantries such as welcome, please, and thank you are part of the retail experience. A person may not buy anything that day, and that's okay. I do and say the same things. But if the ambiance of the store is good, that person will likely go back to that place, or at least tell their friends how nice that shopkeeper was. 

Just my little opinion of the day. Small acts of kindness help to make another person happy.

Monday, February 13, 2012

It's a quarter until six, and there is still light outside! And a bit o' snow, which makes the world even brighter.

My fasting blood glucose has dropped, in the last month(!), from 232 to 135 today.

My blood pressure 121/80.

I have lost five pounds. 

And I am so excited and yet so very exhausted. My plate is very full. Still getting all the paperwork together for the new store, but since the offices were closed for Lincoln's Day, I will have to wait until tomorrow to get the help I need.

My depression isn't awful bad, but I am tired and sleepy and sometimes weepy. That may be because of all the pills I am taking. Thank goodness I can nap when I need to, and sometimes I sleep about 18 hours a day. 

I have not knit one damn stitch in a week.

Wednesday, February 08, 2012

Steve McQueen

  • So. Shall I do bullet points? I believe it is my best option right now. 
  • Thank you all for your kind regards about my diabetes. Y'all be sweet!
  • The change in diet and the additional meds for the diabetes and the cholesterol and the high blood pressure have been a Total Monster eating at my brain. 
  • However, it seems to be working. My blood glucose is mostly below 200 already.
  • Thank goodness for Wednesdays, which is the day I go to Columbia for therapy and allergy shots. There is also a spiffy Goodwill, and I have found the grocery store of my dreams.
  • HyVee is an employee-owned store with a produce section that is bigger than many markets. The employees are polite and ones food is placed in ones cart, unlike certain other stores. Ahem. 
  • There is an incredible amount of organic food, as well as bulk buying for things from red jasmine rice to hummus mix. Then there is the bakery, the seafood, and meat departments.
  • I spent as much there today as I often do at my local grocery store, especially when I am out of almost everything - and I feel that I got so much more value for my bucks.
  • Columbia is not a great huge town; but it the home of Missouri University, aka Mizzou, so it is geared toward a younger, hipper crowd. 
  • There is also a vintage JoAnn's shop, not far from any of my destinations, and that also makes me happy. 
  • Almost lastly, I have been in my sewing studio for the last few days making hippie clothes, and that has made me happier still. Not making the same stupid feed sack bag over and over.
  • I have decided to get a tax # and a business license for my little cottage. 
  • It will be called Purple Squirrel.
  • I thought it would be an unusual name, to draw in the younger, hip crowd as they travel betwixt St. Louis and points west.
  • According to the Urban Dictionary, it is an actual phrase, and not dirty or derogatory. 
  • Purple Squirrel
  • Actually lastly, I have decided to cut my hair very short and let the grey grow out. I am tired of fooling with it. I would, however, love to find a quality wig ala the B52s. In several colors.
  • Time to get my freak on.

Friday, January 27, 2012

Invest Wisely

I am remarkably calm in spite of all that has gone down lately. I knew for much of last year that there was something not at all right about my health. I mean, my clothes just kept getting tighter and tighter, and my closet choices were getting grim. So when Sweetie got a new job with better health coverage, I used it.

I didn't tell anyone, except my therapist, what my goals were for 2012. I wanted to lose weight, to halve my drinking, and to get more physically fit. I had no plan to make this happen, but by making appointments with the allergist/asthma doctor and with my primary care giver, and submitting to all sorts of pokes and sticks and prods, I knew that we'd find some answer as to what was the cause. Maybe I was allergic to brewer's yeast and needed to quit drinking? I didn't know. (That was sort of my hope!)

My family nurse practitioner Judi and I were blindsided when my blood glucose level was 232 last week. It had been 107 back in March; a little elevated but not problematic. Well, what evs. My hand was forced in a way not expected. 

My goal is to lose 50 pounds in the next year, (a pound a week is not unreasonable!,) to not drink so much, and to be more physically active. I am grateful that the things that are wrong with me are treatable. I am grateful, that unlike some friends of mine, I have not needed hip or knee replacement (yet), nor have I had breast or colon cancer. What I have wrong is pretty damn mild. 

Monday, January 23, 2012

Several in the morning, and more at night.

All of my cholesterols are elevated. I just got the meds for that.

My blood pressure indicates that I am drifting between almost and slight hypertension. I have added a new med into the mix.

I am allergic to dogs, house dusts, ragweeds, pigweed, goldenrod, yellow dock, and red cedar. I begin weekly allergy shots in February.

My blood glucose level reveals that I have Type-2 diabetes. I will see my caregiver tomorrow to begin training and treatment.

Wednesday? I get to see my therapist!

Monday, January 16, 2012

Eyes Right

Wow. Just so much going on; for me at least.

A visit with my primary care provider today, who is a woman that I like very much. Blood tests for cholesterol, and got more meds for my slightly elevated blood pressure. I have gained 20 pounds since April of last year. Three in the last month. Less than I feared, but still. That's five bags of sugar.

Therapy on Wednesday and the allergy/asthma/immunologist on Monday next. Yes, I know, I don't have cancer or any severe disease, but all of these doctor-type appointments are very tiring. 

My girlfriend in Indiana is dealing with the life threatening problems of her husband. He is back in the hospital; the fourth time since his heart attack. He won't quit smoking or drinking, and he won't clean his incision which got infected, which is why he is back for another hospital stay. She is at wit's end. I worry for her, damn it. He is a grown ass man, after all, who seemingly does not want to live past age 58. 

Yet here I am, drinking when I know I should not. Birds of a feather, and suicide bent on a slow track. 

I have hopes that this year I will make and stick with some decisions. But like St. Augustine, dear dog, make me pure but not yet.

Eyes Left

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Soothing Comfort

 Corky update. He has made tremendous health gains since we rescued him. The fur on his feet, butt and ankles has grown back, and much of the horrible redness on his belly is gone. Most of this is due to a new diet where corn is not the first ingredient. 

The tea tree shampoo and spray are things he almost enjoys, because I know it makes him feel better. The ear treatment is slowwwwwlllly working, and again, he submits willingly to my ministrations. What a good little guy!

He and Princess play and the the cats ignore him unless he gets too nosy. 

Sweetie's lap is never empty when he's home.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

You'll feel a little prick.


Yesterday was therapy and then my first visit to an allergy/asthma doctor; or immunologist. Dr. Wes Stricker worked at the Mayo clinic for 6 years before coming to Columbia, MO. He says he is very much dedicated to finding and treating the causes of allergies and asthma, as well as eczema, and not just treat the symptoms. I suffer from all three. 

I received about 40 pricks of allergens, and the good news is that cats and dogs dots didn't swell up, and neither did mold or feathers. The ragweed and goldenrod ones did. I lived among fields of ragweed and goldenrod in Indiana. 
I'll go back in 2 weeks for tests and the beginning of the game plan. 

Today was off to the dentist again, to redo an old filling. Painless, but a set of noise-deadening ear phones would have been great. The whine and grind of the instruments wear me out.

Tomorrow? I don my Domestic Goddess robes for a day of making neat and cooking. I'd like to get into my sewing room, too. Thursday, it's back to work.

As for knitting, I ripped out the pair of half-made socks without a qualm after I discovered they were a bit too small for me. I think I was using size 0s on 80 stitches; the gauge was 10 spi. Cast onto size 1s with 80 stitches again and am a couple of inches into the pair.

Thank you for the kind comment, Pam, about my new header photo. I took that one Christmas day; the sky was just so big and beautiful!

Thursday, January 05, 2012

Use gloves provided.

This story may begin when I was 17, and my mother died. She never really fooled around much with my hair, save to give me those foul smelling Toni Perms when I was 7 or 8. Blouse-less, in her brassier, with a cigarette hanging out of one side of her mouth.

I had girlfriends in junior high and high school, and as far as hair went, it was all about braiding about a thousand little braids in our hair, to get some sort of wavy look. This was the early seventies, and we did not have access to today's fancy appliances for straightening or crimping and who knows what all.

Then I moved far away from my girlfriends, and not having any sisters or kind gentle women nearby, my girlie genes almost withered and died. I didn't care for fashion or make up or hair styles. And in the eighties, that was not necessarily a bad thing.

Now, I have friends that love to give pedicure parties and they also offer to help the 'fussing with my hair,' (since I am becoming more and more grey and so need regular 'treatments.' Ahem.)

I am gradually shortening my locks as well as lightening them. Tomorrow? First time ever High Lights.

I am thinking about going dramatic. Why the fuck not?

Also? Can I again say how happy I am to have moved here and to have found such wonderful wimmin friends?

Tuesday, January 03, 2012

A Voice of Reason


I have survived the human construct that is the New Year, and the sun has decided to return to glory yet again. Unlike many years past, this year Sweetie and I went out with friends to celebrate at midnight at Montgomery City's oldest bar. It's a tiny joint and has been in operation since 1962. It was fun, we wore silly hats and beads and leis, and there were noise makers available. 

We returned on New Year's Day for free Bloody Marys, black eyed peas, and Hoppin' John. Free! (I did leave the wonderful bartender a nice tip, though.) The TV was tuned to American Top Gear, and everyone had a good time mocking that as well as the commercials. It's a good bar, need I say, one that opens at 9 am, with an older clientele. Like me. It's a safe place for women to go either alone or in a group.

It's been a nice holiday, with Sweetie having 8 days off over the past two weeks. Still, I hate having my schedule disrupted for so long. Not that I have much of a schedule really, but I do love my alone time and I haven't had that recently.

Corky is improving daily! I bought some Tea Tree Oil shampoo and spray, along with ear mite medicine from and it has made a huge difference! That and the new diet of lamb and rice or chicken and rice where the first ingredient isn't corn. So many animals are allergic to corn, and I may be, too. 

Tea Tree Oil is anti-bacterial and anti-fungal. I think that Corky was afflicted with both in different areas of his body, and all that was complicated by his corn allergy. He has become one with the family, and even Reece's has finally learned to tolerate him and his herding instincts. Several swipes with claws to the nose has helped.

I don't do resolutions, but I would like to lose weight this year. I 'blossomed' this past year, in more ways than one. Only a very few of my clothes fit anymore. On the other hand, I have made strides recently towards 'taking better care of myself.' The therapist, eye exams, teeth exams, well-woman exams. My bone density is good! Yay me! Also, I don't have signs of glaucoma or macular degeneration, and I only have one cavity to fret about. 

It is a sobering (hah) thought, though, that in a mere fifteen years, I will be seventy - should I live so long.